Rediscovering Your Why After Having a Baby

Do you feel like you've lost your sense of purpose since becoming a mom? Are you struggling to find your "why"? You're not alone, Mama. After all, becoming a mom is a HUGE life change! It's a time of great joy and excitement, but it can also be overwhelming and exhausting. You're suddenly responsible for another human being, and it can be hard to find the time or energy to focus on yourself and your passions.

If you're feeling lost and confused, don't worry; there is hope. Let's find your "why" again, Mama!

Let’s be honest: the nonstop pressures of motherhood do not afford much time to nurture passions or relationships, let alone develop a strong sense of self. In fact, a quick Google search of “losing yourself after having a baby” yields about 217,000,000 results! This begs the question: why do so many women feel as though they are no longer “themselves” after becoming parents? And more, what can we do about it?

In our culture as moms, we are told that anything we do for ourselves takes something away from our children. There’s this deep, unwritten sense that if we do something that is solely to fill our own cups, it inherently makes us “less than”. (Spoiler alert: it’s not true.)

Outside of motherhood, our sense of identity comes from the choices we make about things like relationships, careers, hobbies, friendships, and lifestyle. These choices often reflect who we are and what we value in life. Once you become a parent, these choices often change–your life is no longer just yours, it’s entangled with this tiny human (or humans) who are (rightfully so) the center of your universe. But why should you have to choose between finding a life outside of motherhood and being an amazing parent?

The answer is, you shouldn’t. It’s normal to want the absolute best for your family, but it’s also completely and totally natural to want a purpose and a passion outside of motherhood. You can be a mom and a friend, a mom and a nurse, a mom and a business owner. There is no perfect path to reclaiming your sense of self, Mama, but finding your “why” is possible. If you’re feeling anxious, overwhelmed, and exhausted, it’s time to find yourself again.

Here are five tried and true tips to rediscover yourself and find your why after becoming a mother. The process may not be linear, but it will be worth it. YOU are worth it.

1. Find Your “Why”

If you are one of the 71% of working moms in America (U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics), you may have struggled with the decision to go back to work after laying your eyes on that sweet baby for the very first time. While there is no perfect solution, you deserve a career supporting your vision of motherhood. You know the saying, “Do what you love and you’ll never work another day in your life”? If you are going to spend hours away from your children, you’ll be much more satisfied doing something you love. So, Mama, what are you most passionate about? What excites you to get out of bed in the morning? Is it inspiring and empowering others? Is it teaching? Is it living an active lifestyle? Then perhaps becoming a fitness instructor is the path for you. While every career requires work, you won’t mind putting the work into something that feeds your soul!

Take the Quiz: Find Your Why

2. Identify Your Strengths

The most successful people choose paths that combine their passions with their talents. What is your greatest skill set? Think about past jobs, volunteer work, or special projects that energized and inspired you. Develop a list of six to nine skills or activities that you would like to pursue, then start finding jobs that match this skill set or hobbies that fill those voids. You may find your new set of skills doesn’t look exactly the same as the ones you valued most before motherhood. That’s okay–you are evolving, Mama. Understanding and accepting this nuance is key.

3. Don’t Be Afraid to Take a Chance

When you decide to take a chance and try something new, sometimes an unexpected opportunity can come your way. This was the case for Erin DiNicola when she purchased her franchise business.

Prior to becoming a FIT4MOM franchise owner, Erin was a United States diplomat serving our country overseas in Vietnam and Afghanistan. She served in many posts for the Department of State. In her spokesperson capacity, she set up press roundtables and arranged high-level interviews for senior officials, including former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, former Secretary of State John Kerry, and former President Barack Obama.

For years, Erin had been entirely focused on work and on advancing her career. But after the death of a dear friend in the line of duty, she shifted her focus to building the family she had always wanted. Erin married an active-duty Army officer, and soon after, she was pregnant. When Erin’s husband received orders to transfer to a different state, she decided to take a temporary leave of absence from the U.S. Department of State.

Erin discovered FIT4MOM when she started taking classes when her son was three months old. She first became a part-time instructor, then decided to pursue FIT4MOM as her full-time career, officially resigning from her State Department role. A day later, she purchased a FIT4MOM franchise and she’s never looked back.

“Women are the backbone of our society and FIT4MOM’s low cost to franchise entry and extensive back-end support ensure that we have the tools and resources that we need to be successful as business owners, women, and as moms,” said Erin. Every morning, Erin wakes up to her family. She then goes to work where she meets so many beautiful, strong moms and shares her passion for motherhood and fitness. On a daily basis, she is an example of living each day to its fullest and never being afraid to redefine yourself.

Take the Quiz: Identify What’s Important

4. Find flexibility that works with your life

If you are one of the more than 5 million mothers (!!!) who have put their careers on hold to stay home with your children, then you have experience, education, and skills that are in demand in today’s society. If you are looking for flexible work you can do from home, companies such as Hire My Mom or The Mom Project help women find flexible, legitimate, home-based work.

Consultants, accountants, writers and bloggers, financial advisors, designers, personal stylists, virtual assistants—these are just a few careers that can be done from home, with part-time childcare, during the hours that work best with your stage of motherhood. If you're looking for an opportunity to work with your kids by your side, a fitness instructor for a company like FIT4MOM might be the perfect fit, allowing you to give back to your community, make an income, and be present for all your little one’s big moments.

5. Become Your Own Boss

If the challenge of starting a business excites you, then becoming a mompreneur could be your calling!

Lisa worked in the Financial Services industry for 10 years, eventually becoming a Vice President at Merrill Lynch, before purchasing a FIT4MOM franchise. Despite her successful financial career, she was faced with a layoff. With three young children, when the opportunity to purchase her own franchise came her way, she jumped at the opportunity.

“I just could not see myself going back to my 9 to 5 job,” said Lisa. “Now, I can run my business and still pick my kids up from school. I can contribute financially to my family and still attend field trips and school functions.”

During her time with FIT4MOM, Lisa owned one of the largest and most successful franchise territories at FIT4MOM. She had more than 18 locations offering various classes. She now gets to spend her days empowering and inspiring women. Most importantly, becoming a mompreneur has helped her achieve her life goals.

“I am in control of my career. I can feel accomplished both as a mom and a business owner.”

If you are looking for flexibility and have a passion for fitness and motherhood, FIT4MOM is looking for boss moms like you! Communities across the United States are looking for brave women who are passionate about their families, their communities, and their health to open new franchises.

LET’S FIND YOUR WHY, MAMA

Unsure of where to start? Take this quick quiz to find your why, identify your strengths, and see if franchise ownership is for you:

Let’s Do It!

If you know you’re ready to ditch a 9-5, set your own schedule, and become your own boss, click here and take the first step toward recharging your career as a mompreneur!